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Archives - Articles

Our contribution to ZOOFootball's "Most Hated series"...  Oct 2000

Why I Hate Wayne Fereday.

After sliding out of Division One under Jim Smith in May 1989, United
regrouped and prepared for a promotion charge with new blood. A whole new front line was constructed, with the returning Mark McGhee joining prolific but portly goalscorer Mickey Quinn. To supply the burly twosome, the blossoming talents of Falkirk's young winger John Gallacher were acquired, and from QPR at a cost of 400 grand came Wayne Fereday.......

Everything seemed to have fitted together neatly when Leeds were humbled 5-2 on opening day, thanks for four goals from Quinn and one from Gallacher, who both impressed. Even Fereday, who had a quiet game, looked to have shown some promise. How wrong we were.

In hindsight, we should have suspected the worst when confronted with his hideous mousetache. Reminiscent of a Mexican gunslinger from a Sergio Leone movie, albeit reinterpreted by a local amateur dramatic ensemble with an otter's tail for facial hair.

Quite simply, he was a bottler. A big wet tart of a bottler, who could
gallop with gay abandon down the wing like a Shetland pony on acid, provided: 
a) he didn't take the ball with him or 
b) no big nasty defenders tried to tackle him.

His moment of truth came in a match at Ipswich, as he bore down on goal and the travelling fans behind it willed him to score. He looked up in a classic rabbit / headlights pose and meekly sidefooted his shot past the post. Later anecdotal evidence suggested he'd been psyched out by the hard stare of a ball boy....

All told he (dis)graced the black and white shirt 41 times, and failed to
find the net in any of them. The fans of Bournemouth, West Brom, Cardiff and Telford were similarly afflicted until he eventually hung up his boots and announced his intention to become...............a referee

Biffa


Page last updated 24 June, 2009