moments of pleasure

Having bemoaned the ill-fortune of VAR in general and penalties in particular so far this season, Steve Bruce at least changed the record in his post-match lament at Old Trafford on Saturday.

Rather than pinpointing the much-hyped return of Cristiano Ronaldo as the reason for this latest demise, the Newcastle boss chose to blame the media for the abuse he received from away fans after his side fell 1-3 behind.

In the words of Bob Dylan though, "you don't need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows" and old Ronnie Gill is hardly setting the agenda when calling out the manager. It's fair to say that many of Bruce's sternest critics have no knowledge of or interest in the output of that newspaper....

Even if the focus of their attack (Bruce's sunshine break to Portugal last week) was inconsequential, the reaction was pathetic and from the same book of blunders that brought us "keyboard warriors". 

As an aside; if Graeme Jones is doing the real work as is been claimed by some, then what difference does an absentee manager leaving the country make? It's the fact he came back that's the problem....

To the game then and for 45 minutes, the major contribution of you-know-who had been to miscue an attempted volley early on amid general hilarity.

Retaining the back five Newcastle welcomed back fit-again Isaac Hayden - but as a central defender; an attempt to address the problem of players in that position sitting deep and failing to advance in possession and also a further vote of no confidence in a certain Swiss international.

Also recalled was Javier Manquillo for a first PL start since the Brighton debacle in March. Although he'd make a notable contribution after the break, the Spaniard was in the firing line during the first half as the hosts flooded down their left and our right back continually drifted infield. 

Chances for a Magpies side lacking a conventional centre forward were thin on the ground; the main moment of hope when Joe Willock seized on a mis-kick in the 28th minute but could only hammer his shot into the Stretford End from a narrowing angle with Joelinton and Almiron available.

The policy of containment worked for 45 minutes, but sadly Woodman's earlier time-wasting resulted in an additional five minutes, during which his fatal error gave you-know-who his golden moment.

Despite the cancellation of the England versus India test match across the road, we still half-expected this to end up in a cricket score; the return of Ronaldo conjuring up memories of his hat-trick here in 2008 when we contrived to turn a 0-0 at half time into a 0-6 45 minutes later.

Having made a habit of netting here before being pegged back then finally overhauled, Newcastle found an unforeseen equaliser 11 minutes after the restart, a fine move finished crisply by Manquillo - an even more unexpected name on our scoresheet here than Yoshinori Muto or James Perch. 

And in the aftermath of that leveller there were even two half-chances to go ahead - Joelinton stumbling forward to get a shot on goal before Almiron's dangerous ball across the box was sadly nowhere near to Saint-Maximin. Reality rapidly intruded though; parity restored for just six minutes before Ronaldo dashed into the box and rammed a low shot home.

A superb finish from Bruno Fernandes then ended the game as a contest with 10 minutes remaining and prompted "Brucie out" chants before Jesse Lingard added gloss to the final score in added time.

A familiar enough story for those seasoned away travellers in one corner then, on the occasion of our 500th Premier League game on the road. We've seen it all before, endless reruns of that Likely Lads sketch: Newcastle F.....Newcastle fight back? Newcastle forge ahead?....Newcastle fail.

In our own patented style we raised hopes and prompted delusions of competence before imploding amidst a welter of recriminations and general badness. The home side weren't great, but didn't need to be while we weren't as poor as feared. Hardly a reason for optimism.

Attention now switches to SJP on Friday night, when we attempt to kick-start our season against a Leeds side who have their own struggles. Despite the absence of Callum Wilson, it's a plausible opportunity for three points - although it's to be hoped that Karl Darlow is ready to resume.

The mood in the dressing room is unclear, but our view remains that Bruce hasn't "lost" the crowd yet, at least to the extent that many of his predecessors did. His petty comments are hardly endearing though.  

It's one thing for a contingent of fans on an away day to give the boss grief when things go awry on the field - but quite another when those who go to home games join in the chorus of disapproval.

Fans of course can be bought off - look no further than 70,000 true believers present here today, barely four months after a section of the same support caused a Premier League game to be called off because of their protests.

The difference of course is that our custodians have no reason to actually try and move the club forward or devise anything approaching a coherent recruitment and retention strategy.

Yes there's a 25 man squad, but it's an effort to try and make head nor tail of what's in it and what they are for. Bruce has now been in charge for 93 games in all competitions, not that you'd know from this interminable muddle. We remain the equivalent of a jigsaw without a picture on the lid. 

Sniping at journalists - or banning them - wilfully avoids the fact that we are regressing on and off the field under the guidance of Bruce and his employer, neither of whom actually seem bothered.

His sound bites were as embarrassing and irrelevant as the un-credited statement that emerged from Barrack Road or Shirebrook a week earlier - another laughable attempt at "communication" that strengthens the case for reverting to the previous policy of radio silence.

Biffa

This report is dedicated to life-long
supporter Bob Ward, who passed
away last week at the age of 86.
RIP.